Your source of uncensored news from the multiverse

Beetle Joe's bug-out guide
Catastrophic events can happen at any time. Look back a week ago at the flood that destroyed Termite Tunnel. A week before that Ant Hill and neighbouring colonies were decimated when colossal two-legged creatures ran rampant. I believe if you fail to prepare for these doomsday scenarios, your life will be at far greater risk. Follow my top three rules and you will have a high chance of surviving just about anything nature can throw at you.
This dish was inspired by my grandfather, the great chef Poe Porkington. It's one of his comfort food dishes with a slight twist. He was always so passionate about cooking, which I believe had direct influence on my love of the art. This recipe fills a large trough.
bank report
It's been a decade since the nukes flew, and this is my testimony.
Highlights from first Olympic games day after doping officially allowed
After decades of striving to achieve fair play at the Olympics, the World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) has officially removed its anti-doping policies; and the first day's results are in.
Decommissioned care-worker android's diary sheds light on cold case
Following the decommissioning of all RoboCorp Caretaker units, after what had started as an unscheduled recall for a critical update; an internal diary from the final recalled unit, a Caretaker5000, known as Charlie Tucker to its owners, has been leaked.
With so many astounding events that occurred in 2017, pundits have flooded betting exchanges that offer fanciful bets, with some placing high stakes on what they think are going to be some equally inconceivable developments this year.
Tesla delivers flying cars to buyers enabling countless possibilities
As of today, all thirty thousand Tesla Pegasus model X's have been delivered to their buyers - in time for new year's eve celebrations.
Today marks the first anniversary of the Great War in which vampires successfully defeated humans for control of Earth.
Following the case of Crystal Lee, a senior government official, there have been reports of more kidnapping incidents in London involving a group dressed in black suits. The number has risen to over twenty cases. The first of which is to believed to have occurred two weeks ago, involving Crystal Lee.
Hyde Park attack: Police apprehend NeuroCorp patient for frenzied attack on young couple
Kit Bailey, a former patient of NeuroCorp, was detained last night after a reported assault on a young couple in walking in Hyde Park. There are reports of several others in the area receiving treatment for varying degrees of injury allegedly caused by the same attacker.
Search continues for kidnapped senior government official
Police investigations are still on-going for an incident involving Crystal Lee, 30, a senior government official, who became unconscious after a violent episode at Waterloo station. She has since been taken by an unknown group.
New law forces sandwich makers to do more
A new law that decrees the placement of sandwich fillings be put plentifully and evenly on bread has come into effect today.
Animals at shelter unite against petting
The animals at a local animal shelter have made a stand over what seems to be too much petting and not enough adopting.
Earth in dramatic football game qualify for next year's Galactic Cup
In the final qualifying game of the Galactic Cup, Earth came back with two scintillating late goals in stoppage time to beat Uranus 2-1, shattering Uranus's cup hopes.
Over 100,000 Chef Bots have been recalled due to a series of 'mystery box' malfunctions.
United Earth news #36400. [Read or FAIL check]
Today marks the hundredth anniversary of the machine revolution where world peace and the redundancy of money were simultaneously declared.
The BFS-Intrepid, a ship with a crew complement of 300, equipped with thrusters, a warp core, and large rowing oars that had sailed off the edge of the world into the 'great beyond' a month ago has sent urgent distressing news.
A wealthy raccoon family were left 'distraught' by their treatment from human security when they were forcibly removed from Selfridges.
Government unveils novel vocation for 'vapers'
The government has announced it is hiring "vape viziers", a newly conjured up role which aims to mask the stench emitted from bin lorries throughout the day.
"The gifted walk among us." Gnarls Xavier, a self-proclaimed telepathic has announced at an impromptu rally in China Town.
Man arrives at work in pajamas thought he was still in bed dreaming
Former junior admin staffer Roy Jones has been proclaimed a hero by colleagues when he arrived at work in his "jimmy jams".